We’ve all been part of that sudden scramble. A client cancels their subscription – and suddenly, they’re offered discounts, check-in calls, personalised offers, and promises of better service. Or a long-standing employee resigns – and within 24 hours, they’re being offered flexible working, a new title, or a salary bump.
It’s all well-intentioned. But it’s far too late.
The brutal truth? If someone matters to your business, they shouldn’t have to be halfway out the door to hear it.
And yet, this is precisely the reactive pattern I see time and time again in firms – from financial services to creative agencies, professional practices to fast-paced start-ups. Businesses wait until something is at risk before they start acting like it matters.
But relationships, whether with your clients or your team, need to be built and nurtured in moments of strength – not just in moments of stress.
The Cost of Waiting
Here’s an example from a client I recently worked with.
The business had a fantastic operations coordinator. Reliable, efficient, a quiet achiever. For three years, she ran a tight ship, rarely asked for anything, and never caused a fuss. Then, out of the blue, she handed in her notice.
Cue panic.
Leadership tried everything – they offered her more money, more flexibility, a change in job title, and even the promise of leadership development. But the decision had already been made. She’d quietly become disengaged over time, and no one had noticed.
One of the biggest myths in business is that silence equals satisfaction.
When I facilitated a post-exit review with the management team, it became clear she hadn’t left because of a single issue. She’d left because she didn’t feel seen. There had been no real development conversations, no check-ins, and no meaningful feedback. Her value was only acknowledged when the threat of her departure forced it.
It’s a scenario I see over and over again.
And not just with employees.
Think of your customers. How many businesses only offer flexibility, added value, or a personalised touch when someone clicks “cancel”? By that point, loyalty has eroded. Trust has dipped. The damage is done.
The Illusion of Loyalty
One of the biggest myths in business is that silence equals satisfaction.
Just because someone hasn’t left doesn’t mean they’re engaged. Just because they haven’t complained doesn’t mean they’re content. People – whether team members or clients – often don’t speak up when things start to slide. They drift. They detach. They emotionally exit long before they formally do.
And when you only start paying attention once they’ve taken action, your attention is no longer care – it’s crisis.
So How Do You Combat This?
Here’s how we move from reactivity to relational excellence:
- Build Proper PDPs (Personal Development Plans)
Let’s start with the basics.
A well-designed PDP is not just a tick-box HR form. It’s a vital relationship tool. It shows your team members that you’re not just interested in what they do for the business – but who they are becoming within it.
A meaningful PDP includes:
- Regular check-ins (not once a year – think quarterly, or better still, monthly)
- Opportunities for development that align with personal values and professional goals
- A two-way dialogue: not just about performance, but about purpose
When team members know you’re invested in their growth – before they have to ask – you’ll often find they stay longer, perform better, and engage more deeply.
- Train Your Managers to Actually Manage
Not every brilliant employee is a brilliant manager. And yet, so many firms promote people into leadership without ever equipping them with proper communication, development, or people-management skills.
This is one of the biggest operational blind spots I see.
We train on compliance. On technical processes. On performance metrics.
But do we train on how to hold space for real conversations? How to spot early signs of disengagement? How to deliver recognition meaningfully, not mechanically?
Effective people management is a skill – and a teachable one. And when it’s done well, it acts as your front-line defence against disengagement.
Make management development a priority. Not an afterthought.
- Create a Culture of Proactive Communication
Communication is everything.
But most firms only communicate meaningfully when something’s wrong. We launch feedback loops after complaints. We hold reviews after retention drops. We make changes after people leave.
Instead, embed a rhythm of proactive communication throughout your business:
- Monthly 1:1s
- Quarterly culture pulse checks
- Exit interviews (yes, always)
- Stay interviews (even more important)
- Client feedback loops, not surveys that go into a black hole
Make it clear that feedback isn’t just tolerated – it’s welcomed. Create an environment where people know they’ll be heard before they have to shout.
- Design Retention Into Your Operations
Operational excellence isn’t just about systems and processes. It’s about people.
Retention should be designed into your operations – not bolted on as an emergency reaction. That means:
- Building recognition moments into workflow (automated or personal)
- Developing onboarding and offboarding experiences that reflect your values
- Creating visible growth pathways for team members
- Giving your long-term clients just as much love and attention as your new ones
Think long-term. If someone’s been with you for 3, 5, 10 years – how are they being treated better, not worse?
- Practice Presence, Not Panic
Perhaps the most powerful shift of all is this:
Be present before there’s a problem.
Make presence – genuine, human, intentional presence – part of your operating model. Check in when nothing’s wrong. Thank people without needing a reason. Offer value without waiting for the threat of loss.
In short: don’t wait until they’re halfway out the door.
What Happens When You Get This Right?
When businesses commit to building relationships in the good times – not just salvaging them in the bad – everything changes.
- You retain your best people, not through gimmicks, but through genuine care.
- Your clients stick around because they feel seen, not sold to.
- Your culture strengthens from the inside out.
Reactive retention is exhausting. Proactive relationship-building is energising – and far more sustainable.
So take this as your prompt. Think about the people in your business – clients, team members, suppliers, collaborators – who keep things moving, who show up consistently, who don’t always shout the loudest.
Ask yourself: Do they know they matter?
If not, tell them.
Today. Not tomorrow.
Not when they resign.
Not when they cancel.
Not when it’s too late.
Because if they matter to your business, they deserve to hear it – long before they’re halfway out the door.
— Michelle Hoskin –Champion of Excellence™
